A collection of short erotic stories and jokes. Sexual, romantic, and sensual stories with vibrant interesting characters. 1000+ Adult Short Stories Read Online/ PDF Free Download.

Below we have few adult short stories. You can download the PDF for free from below.

Adult Short Stories 1

A guy takes his wife to the Doctor. The Doc says, “Well, it’s either
Alzheimer’s disease or AIDS.”
“What do you mean?” the guy says. “You can’t tell the difference?”
“Yeah, the two look a lot alike in the early stages. Tell you what, drive her
way out into the country, kick her out of the car, and if she finds her way back,
don’t fuck her.”

Adult Joke 2

A penguin takes his car to a mechanic because there is a funny noise coming
from under the hood.
“Leave it with me,” says the mechanic. “Come back in 20 minutes.”
So, off goes the penguin. It’s a pretty hot day and he’s a cool weather kind of
guy so on spotting an ice cream van he goes and buys himself a 99. Now,
penguins aren’t very good at eating ice creams—the lack of opposable thumbs
makes it tricky. So by the time the penguin has finished his 99, he is completely
covered in ice cream. It is all over his beak and all over his flippers. Feeling a
little sticky, he goes back to the garage.
“Oh, hello,” says the mechanic, wiping his hands on a cloth.
“Hello,” replies the penguin. “Was it anything serious?”
“Not really, but it looks like you’ve blown a seal.”
“Oh no, no, no!” says the penguin, wiping his mouth. “It’s just ice cream.”

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Adult Joke 3

A man came home from work sporting two black eyes.
“What happened to you?” asked his wife.
“I’ll never understand women,” he replied. “I was riding up an escalator
behind this pretty young girl, and I noticed that her skirt was stuck in the crack
of her ass. So I pulled it out, and she turned around and punched me in the eye!”
“I can certainly appreciate that,” said the wife. “But how did you get the
second black eye?”
“Well, I figured she liked it that way,” said the husband, “so I pushed it back
in.”

Adult Joke 4

A young couple is on their way to Vegas to get married. Before getting there,
the girl says to the guy that she has a confession to make: The reason that they
have not been too intimate is that she is very flat-chested. If he wishes to
cancel the wedding, it’s okay with her. The guy thinks about it for a while and
says he does not mind that she is flat, and sex is not the most important thing in a
marriage. Several miles down the road, the guy turns to the girl and says that he
also wants to make a confession: He says that below his waist he is just like a
baby. If the girl wants to cancel the marriage, it’s okay with him. The girl thinks
about it for a while and says that she does not mind and that she also believes
there are other things far more important than sex in a marriage. They are happy
that they are honest with each other and go on to Vegas and get married. On
their wedding night, the girl takes off her clothes; she is as flat as a washboard.
Finally, the guy takes off his clothes. One glance at the guy’s naked body and
the girl faints and falls to the floor. After she regains consciousness the guy says,
“I told you before we got married. Why did you still faint?”
The girl says, “You told me it was just like a baby.”
The guy replies, “Yes, 8 pounds and 21 inches.

Adult Joke 5

Q. What are the three words men hate to hear during sex?
A. “Are you done?”
Q. What are the three words women hate to hear during sex?
A. “Honey, I’m home!”

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