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Yesterday I accidentally hit a little kid in my car. It wasn’t serious — nobody saw me.
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There is a picture on my phone of me sleeping. I live alone.
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My daughter won’t stop crying and screaming in the middle of the night. I visit her grave and ask her to stop, but it doesn’t help.
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“I can’t sleep,” she whispered, crawling into bed with me. I woke up cold, clutching the dress she was buried in.
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She asked why I was breathing so heavily. I wasn’t.
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There’s nothing like the laughter of a baby. Unless it’s 1 a.m. and you’re home alone.
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They celebrated the first successful cryogenic freezing. He had no way of letting them know he was still conscious.
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She had heard of demons from stories her mother used to tell her as a child. Now she got to see them for real after she got married
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I’ve got a kid in Africa that I feed, that I clothe, that I school, that I inoculate for 75 cents a day. Which is practically nothing compared to what it cost to send him there?
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My sister died yesterday. Now I wish the doctor separated us at birth.
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To cure my sister’s insomnia, I helped her sleep forever.
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Such Beautiful feet. Such a pretty waist. Such smooth arms. Such a soft neck. Such juicy lips. Oh! You have your mother’s eyes. Said the cannibal before eating his own daughter.
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