There’s a sexy new singer in town, and guess what.He just turned 13.

This summer, I’m gonna see 50 dicks.

I wanted you to know I saw another gay film today. It had way more sex than “Brokeback Mountain”. But I think I liked it better.

Exactly. Nothing should be longer than a “Gilmore Girls.

when you’re alone with your thoughts in bed tonight, you’re not gonna look back at this party and think, “That was fun fun.

Oh, you’re gonna love her. She has 8 million followers.

Your first tweet was, “Twitter is retarded. Come at me”.

She steals from Starbucks. She never drinks water.

He’s walking in with his lucky date and what appears to be an old Backstreet Boy.

I want to run Hollywood. I’m gonna sit on the top floor of a very tall building and be in charge of everyone.”

we could play a sexy little game. It’s called, “What Musician Do You Hate?” Not sure how that’s sexy, but… I guess Maroon 5 kind of sucks.

Viewers will be able to watch any camera at any time. So if you need to yawn, burp, sneeze, fart, do it now and do it fast.

Gay misogyny is real.

I love women. I think all pilots should be women, and I think all flight attendants should be…”
“I’m gonna donate 10% of my album sales to the American Cancer Society!

We’re both busy, you with work, and me with my quest to chase dreams.

Brooke Dubek /Helene Yorke

I’m free to be me, which rhymed. I’m going to be a rapper, rap critic.

Brooke Dubek /Helene Yorke

We’re hot, we’re cool, We’re killing it. Oh, hey, remind me, I have to find a guy to go home with tonight because I don’t have a house.”

Brooke Dubek /Helene Yorke

We’re hot, we’re cool, We’re killing it. Oh, hey, remind me, I have to find a guy to go home with tonight because I don’t have a house.”

Brooke Dubek /Helene Yorke

I have seen one dick in four years. This summer I’m going to see 50 dicks.”

Brooke Dubek /Helene Yorke

Like, the world is my oyster.”

Brooke Dubek /Helene Yorke

Hi, I’m Cary Dubek, and I’m reading for the role of ‘Man at Party Who Smells Fart.’ ”

Cary Dubek/Drew Tarver

I don’t know how you still watch this show. I meant there’s too many close-ups of feet with bug bites.”

Cary Dubek/Drew Tarver

I think he is bisexual, because it’s not 2010 anymore. Those people are real now. They exist.”

Cary Dubek/Drew Tarver

He still watches ‘Survivor,’ which is like violently straight.”

Cary Dubek/Drew Tarver

We love that suit and those heavy shoes.”

Cary Dubek/Drew Tarver

They bumped Kerry Washington? What is happening?”

Cary Dubek/Drew Tarver

Well it’s very nice to meet all of what you are.”

Cary Dubek/Drew Tarver

I actually came up with three new ideas for shoes today. One: laces at the bottom. Two: shoes, but invisible. Three: edible shoes.

Lance

Maybe I can meet you at the baggage carousel bathroom, and kiss you on the lips, your, uh, private lips.

Jeff

You gotta live life to the fullest, ’cause you never know when it’s all gonna be over, so you’ve just got to chase dreams.

Pat Dubek

I don’t care if any of you are famous as long as you are happy.”

Pat Dubek